Remember, people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold, but so does a hard-boiled egg.
We all do it. You do it. I do it. Your friends do it. We judge. The human mind is hardwired to judge. This survival mechanism makes it very hard to meet someone without interpreting their actions. While we tend to think that our judgments are based on the content of conversations and other obvious behaviors, the research says otherwise. In fact, the majority of our judgments are focused on actions performed by the people. We often form complete opinions about people based solely on these actions. It’s unfortunate how some people with the best of intentions but poor actions are labelled as having a “bad character”. It’s harsh, but true. If you look around you, almost everyone is judged for what they have done, intentionally or not.
From the first moment you meet someone, they are consciously or unconsciously judging you. Even before you've opened your mouth, they've started the process of observing who you are and what you're about just by looking at and assessing your actions. People will draw conclusions about your character based on how you act. How we judge others is mainly affected by how we’re raised. The two most commonly ‘taught’ approaches are based on how people interact with us: one on their actions, the other on their intentions.
The goal of either is to make human behavior comparable and judgeable. We all judge people just by their actions in almost all cases because we can’t see their intentions. Even if they have a heart of gold with good intentions all we can see is their actions. When you grow up in a home where little emphasis is placed on outcomes, where you feel that your best is always good enough, chances are, you will hold others mostly to their intentions too. If you’re raised under the motto of “actions speak louder than words” in this case it’s usually the result that matters. No second-place trophies. It all about “you have done it” or “you haven’t done it”. Focusing on actions is a great motivator to try hard and hold both people and yourself accountable.
Because all you have to do is to check and observe the result of anything through the action performed. We usually tend to judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their actions. This gap, if present, creates a double standard. You judge others for what they do and not for what they think or what intentions they have. The only exception is when it comes to you. You judge yourself on the basis of your intentions and not for what you have done either good or bad but your actions are a reflection of your thoughts, and therefore of you character. So next time before doing something, think twice, because that will form a part of people’s judgement of your character. Maybe we need a new way to make sense of people’s intentions and actions altogether.